It’s dumb, but it’s no dumber than many of my preceding encounters: I kissed #181 just because it was New Year and I was damned if I was going to attend a New Year party without kissing someone.

Even so, I was already well-versed in the anti-climactic nature of New Year. I was at #166‘s party and I guess I wasn’t really in the mood, and I wound up drinking gin with orange juice. Nobody wanted to make out, which was fine because I wasn’t really interested in anybody, but I was still being kind of predatory anyway, trying to ingratiate myself to a really drunk girl who wasn’t my type in real life. Not cool. But I did bond with some folks and then when I was going home I drank whisky with some strangers on the street.

I had an acquaintance back then who said how you spent New Year was basically a trailer for how your year would go, so I got halfway superstitious about that and I was like: goddamn I need some action. I didn’t want another curse of January.

#181 was a boy from the Internet who’d come down from the highlands to have sex with Leonard. That’s all. I kissed him when we were saying goodbye. Beyond that my main recollection is when he asked what Leonard’s deepest fear was, and Leonard paused and reached deep into his soul and confessed, “Being alone, I guess,” and #181 said, “Huh,” and explained that his was being crushed by a fold-out bed.


~ by Nine on 2 November 2009.

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